Friend In School Pillows

"Before you take my phone away, can I tweet that you're taking my phone away?"

'If history keeps repeating itself, why do I have to repeat this class?'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

Yearbook

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

'I need to read five books this weekend to graduate - any suggestions?'

"We've invented a new word!"

"This is the fourth student who bubbled in Y-O-U-R N-A-M-E when I told the class to 'bubble in your name'!"

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

'Everyone's true personality comes out on dress-down Fridays, even the boss's.'

'Hey, man, cool shirt.'

'This part was tenure.'

Spring To Do List: Teach, Testing, Testing,Test Some More. . .

'Your thesis on 'how to keep warm in winter'? Interesting.'

'You have failed on all counts...'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

Buddhist photo albums,

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

'Where Are They Now?'

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."