Frequent Business Travel T-Shirts

"Hell: The Airport"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

The World's Easiest Airport

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

"Expense account or regular?"

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

'Hanson - committee of four.'

Airport

Technological Dependence.

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

'He must be going economy!'

Airport Bored Rooms

Gates A-B Taking Care of Business, C-D Funny Business, E-F Do Your Business.

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

Business-Class.

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

'Business or pleasure?'

John couldn't help but think that his team had a different perspective on the event than he did...

Airline Mergers.

Business man with places he's visited on his suitcase and places he's worked for on his chair.

US Airlines

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

'Sorry to leave you in the lurch but this trip is important'