French Wine Fanatic T-Shirts

'No, no white wine, just a couple cases of '64 Chateau Beychevelle back there between the beans and the diapers - five bucks each.'

Sloaney Pony.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Yoga for Alcoholics

Sauvignon Bonk

"Now I really hate poetry."

Honoré de Balzac

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

"I make it myself!"

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

Garlic Free Zone.

"Do you think there's ANY possibility that the 76 pints of lager,13 bottles of wine and 12 kilos of chocolate you've had MAY have contributed to you feeling 'a bit under the weather'?"

Woman thinking about luxuries.

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"So the wife says to me, you need to take the dog out..." "Wine list, please."

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

The wine-shop

'S'more wine?'

"What are they saying this week? Are coffee, chocolate, and wine good or bad for us?"

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

'Wine represents all things civilized. It's an artistic expression, a manifestation of cultural enlightenment...'

Cooking with Pierre

"Milk does a body good but champagne does it better!"

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.