Freelance Aficionado T-Shirts

"I'm freelance, that's why I'm faster."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Introducing...Anagraman.

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

"My calculations are complete. We could toast 12,000 marshmallows every day for every person on earth for 36,000 years with one solar flare."

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

'The mask?... Oh, I always try to obscure my face a little, at parties. Just to give the other guys a fighting chance.'

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

"That's just the end of the panel, girl."

Little boy reading a classic whilst his Dad reads a comic.

"Stupid – yet irresistible."

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

'That was quite a snow storm last night.'

'I don't actually work for you. I'm a consultant.'

"Wow, you look sexy today."

"The night raid on the kitchen bench was a disaster sir! The owner woke up, came downstairs for a glass of water and attacked us!"

Noah's Ark leaves pair of unicorns behind

Batman - Face ID

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

"And Jasper, dear Jasper, with his soulful eyes and great sagging jowl, would be stretched upon the floor, his tail a-thump when he heard his master's footsteps." Penny loved Daphne Du Maurier's 'Rebecca'.

Love in Boom

"No offense, but I'm eternally grateful to know that you stand no chance of ever passing on your genes."

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

Spring Cleaning

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'

'I hate playing stinkbugs! Every time we press them on defense, they just let 'e rip!'

"It's just until he gets over his laryngitis."

'Now then, let me explain the rules of this therapy.'

"Now that's art!"

"There are 206 bones in your body...How would you like one more?"