Freak Show Fans T-Shirts

'There's always the circus, Ella. be a bearded lady.'

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

Applause

Astral Projection

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

Freaks of nature exhibit.

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

"I can't be sure...I only got a quick look."

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

Morgue - "Welcome to 'Celebrity Autopsy'"

'It's not for acting...It's for a testimony in a courtroom.'

Houdini.

Out of Context Nite with Jeremy Clarkson.

"Hi, I'm Jamie Theakston and this is Dogs Might Fly."

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

We really have to stop letting him watch the news.

"Don't ask where it comes from. Just be glad I can provide."

'Gee... Nothing says 'I'm dead' like a severed head.'

"That's what I call an off-off-off-off-off Broadway show!"

"Binge-watching squirrels. What are you doing?"

"Meaning of life!!" "Meaning of 'Game of Thrones' series finale"

"According to your resume, your last three employers are some of the biggest crime families on the eastern seaboard. I don't know what position you've applied for, but welcome to the company."

Celebrity Clerk: Schrodinger's Cat.

"It's like 'Family Circus' meets 'The Wire,' but on a cruise ship."

"Forensics put time of death about 3 hours ago chief. . .they're certain it was a potato gun."

"Hey - didn't I see you on TV last night?"

'My meeting is running a little late, Marge. Can you reheat dinner when I get home?'

'Then I grabbed the ice pick - I mean, pickax. Sorry, I always get those two mixed up.'

'Hi, I'm here to apply for the EXTREME make over talk show!'

"Mom, turn on the TV!"