Fortune-seeking Financier Prints

"Relax, Eddie. Our research division says the fundamentals look good."

'I'm here to test the magic 8-ball.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

"Sorry, stock-market jitters."

'Time to buy.'

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

'All those in favor of requesting a government bailout, say 'Karl Marx'.'

"However, we're doing rather well, according to uninformed sources."

"We've made $7.50. Can we retire yet?"

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

"My name's Edwin, and I'm addicted to risk."

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

Snowflake Investments...penny stocks, junk bonds: 'Here today, gone tomorrow!'

"Dow's up!"

Melissa's Mark Prediction Service

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

Yomp Investments - Big risks sometimes means BIG BUCKS!: 'I'm a little uneasy about the 'sometimes'...'

'There it is! I've isolated the origin of the firm's demise.'

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

Man sees 'Palm Readings and Stock Projections' business window

'Stocks gyrated today on news life is full of suprises.'

Golden Eggs.

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

"Trepanning for gold"

Sale - All Junk Bonds 50% Off.

'Does he do anything besides watch the money?'

Gambling on office building construction

Sounds of the market hitting all time highs. . .

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."