For Husband T-Shirts

"Call Jane."

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Come dine with me!

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Butterfly Woman

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

You're my Mona Lisa.

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Larry's used art

Killer Executive Suits.

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

Gender Equality

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Police Feline Unit

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!