Football Fan Pillows

'See that? A pile of twigs! That's how you end up if you don't stretch properly before the game.'

"Well, thats buggered that idea"

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

'You slips have been watching football again.'

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

'It doesn't make you less of a man if you can't understand the off-side rule.'

"The robot you sold me is cheaper and more precise than my human workers, but I can't discuss the football with it and it doesn't fetch my coffee!"

Pilgrims and Wampanoag men celebrate Thanksgiving by playing football.

Bill hid the football while the cat took the blame for the vase.

'Gosh, you seem to know a lot about soccer. I like that in a coach.'

'Now what?!'

'I like to mix it up a bit now and then.'

'It's a clear case of shepherding!'

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

'Tilt your head a little to the right! I'm losing the Aloha Bowl!'

Plug-In Ball

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

Football merchandise - Replica bungs

"Go deep!"

"First it was no football, now it's no money. I don't think they know what they're doing."

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

"The talking stone wall of New England." "Tommy’s days are numbered—he’s seventy in quarterback years!" "You’re nuts! Look at the numbers, they don’t lie."

"And did the pro football games begin right after the feast, Mrs. Kelly?"

Dog-Pile

"It's a birthing position, Dan. Quit yelling 'Hike.'"

"Two minute warning..."

"Uptight End"

Man who has had his hat ruined by boys showing their lenient mother.

Foot Golf

'David when we said we would like you to be a role model for us. . .'

'I wouldn't know, son -- I'm the football coach.'

'Sure I know when you eat turkey and dressing and pumpkin pie. During halftime.'

Sam Allardyce

Michael Vick-tory Dance

'Where in the rules does it say I can't keep a mascot in the goals?'