Foot Care Devotee Pillows

'I'm just going to soak my feet.'

'My feet are killing me.'

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

Spa

"I stand corrected."

'My god! Have you seen the size of this chiropodist's bill?!!'

Some unusual family photographs decorate podiatrist's desk.

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

'So you're off to see the chiropodist... the only time in your life you shouldn't put your best foot forward!'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"You try staying this this after giving birth two million times."

'Yes, Jeb, they do resemble the cow's symptoms...'

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'

Sunday morning provides a time to contemplate the state of our souls. Or soles, as the case may be.

Who says you're pasture prime?

GURLERS

"You complete me."

'You got here just in time - These shoes are killing you.'

Cutting Toenails.

'You are pigeon toed.'

Vernon has a Floss with Death

'A crack team of scientists searches tirelessly for a cure for baldness.'

'Your 'guns' are very impressive Norman,but not at work.'

Spa day

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

So I used body soap to wash my face. Why is that so bad? Details matter. Pay attention to your surroundings. Face soap isn't body soap. Conditioner isn't shampoo. Moisturizer isn't hand lotion. If we're ever going to move in together and have a future you've got to pay attention to me and the nuances about my life. Conditioner isn't shampoo? I'm livid and you have stinky hair!

Doctor to man with baseball player and footbal player on feet: 'You have a bad case of athlete's foot.'

"Wool is O.K. but there's a fortune in dental floss."

"What is it going to be, a breakfast or shampoo?"

'When you said you are a hammer-toe specialist . . .'

"Rapunzel! Rapunzel! Your shampoo delivery is here!"

Chiropodist is wearing a gas mask while treating a client.

"If you won't brush or floss could you at least run your tongue over your teeth once in a while?"