Foodie With A Flair For Food Humor Pillows

Jewish Geometry

"How can you be out of wings?"

hard-boiled egg...

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'The Burrito King.'

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

Banana Split Personality

The Main Types of Cheese

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

"My diet plan for you is if it tastes good, spit it out."

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

Diner

'What do you do with the thumbs?'

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

'Someone's been tampering with this chicken. It tastes like chicken.'

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"He's fond of garlic, so his bark is much worse than his bite."

'Would you care for some fresh pepper? Well too bad, because all we have is these dried up old peppercorns.'

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

Baloneystini

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"