Foodie With A Flair For Finance Gifts

"Liverwurst is down an eighth, egg-salad is up two and a half, and peanut-butter-and-jelly remains unchanged."

Build Your Own Portfolio

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"You got maybe one that smells like cheese blintzes frying?"

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

"'Well done' lulled him into complacency."

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

'Gentlemen-the sweets smell of success!'

'Therapy?'

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

'My husband will order the wine. He happens to be a graduate of the 3-Second Master of Wine program.'

"Wait a minute- these are just the ten commandments of perfect mashed potatoes."

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

'I'm very impressed that you ordered the entire meal in French. Pity it's a Chinese restaurant...'

'We'll get our food....eventually.'

An art director eats: 'Waiter! Does this lettuce say 'salad' to you?'

'I'm afraid the Chef's Surprise today is that he ran off with one of the waitresses.'

'Are they fat free, low carb, high fibre and organic?'

Beef Wellingtons

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

'What did the fund manager say to the investment advisor?'

'You're cute when you blow your cool.'

"Now, what? I'm wearing a hair net."

'Monsieur, in this café you've got to dance your order.'

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

"Take your time. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

"The butter-poached lobster with melted leeks and horseradish creme fraiche...you want that in a wrap?"