Foodie With A Financial Sense Of Humor Pillows

Lunch Broker

"How can you be out of wings?"

hard-boiled egg...

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'The Burrito King.'

Banana Split Personality

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

'I think I'll go home and eat'

The Main Types of Cheese

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"My diet plan for you is if it tastes good, spit it out."

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

Diner

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'Someone's been tampering with this chicken. It tastes like chicken.'

'What do you do with the thumbs?'

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"He's fond of garlic, so his bark is much worse than his bite."

'The food is great, but it's embarrassing the way she always insists on burping you.'

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

Baloneystini

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."