Foodie Who Doesn't Mind Waiting T-Shirts

'We serve comfort food in a laid back atmosphere, so lower your expectations, be prepared to wait, and I'll be back for your order unless I go home.'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

Important Food Groups

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

Benihana style of cooking.

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

Kitchen Kapers

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

The Streets - Night

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

Burnt or Raw?

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

Back in 5 minutes!

"Your meal sounded nice."

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

Thermidor Dali

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

North Fork, the town too tough to diet.

Dad's old fashioned barbeque

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"As you can guess, Rico is my role model."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'