Foodie In Recovery Pillows

"I used to be a foodie. Now I'm a fussy glutton."

"I never thought I'd be saying this, but I'd like some hospital food."

"She may be useless in the bedroom but she claims to be a wow in the kitchen!"

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

"I'm taking you off two of the four food groups."

"Pardon, I should have been more specific...is everything all right with THE MEAL?"

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

'I'm fat, I eat too much and my blood pressure is high. . . Have a beer and some chips but feel guilty about it.'

'You have to lose weight. Stop having intimate dinners for two, when you are not expecting anyone to join you.'

"It was a cold night, like tonight, back, I'd say, in 1954."

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"He cooks under the guidance of a smoke alarm."

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

"Back inside, Bernie! The buffet is full of shrimp, pork and ham!"

'Whatever fast food - fried stuff, fat, sugar, salt for the 'Doesn't Bother Me' person'.

'I think our marriage would make a great country song.'

'Enlighten me!'

"The I'm Going Off My Diet special comes with a side order of Guilt."

'Oh I can't stay here, i'm allergic to shell fish.'

"Fred? Can you help me? I'm really in a jam."

Me On A Diet: "I should not be eating this!"

"Could Doctor see him now-I have the dinner to cook."

'Please be careful, sir, the plate is hot.'

"I don't like sweetcorn".

'Sorry to keep you waiting.'

"I asked for something gluten-free, dairy-free and meat-free and he brought me a glass of water."

'Do you have another menu of what I can have?'

'Let's see...we've taken you off smoking, drinking and rich food. What else do you enjoy?'

'What do you mean, the food is terrific?'

'As your weight-loss counselor, I must advise you to stop thinking of eating as a hobby.'

"I'm one of those fortunate people that can ear what they like."

"Think of it as cajun blackened oatmeal."

'Of course I've burnt your dinner. You're in hell!'

Guy begging for money holding his hat out. Next to him an out of work chef holding his frying pan out begging for money.