Foodie Friar T-Shirts

The Pope cooking some popadoms for Popes

'Out of the frying pan and into the friar!'

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Counting ribs

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

Kitchen Kapers

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

Benihana style of cooking.

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Important Food Groups

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

The Streets - Night

Burnt or Raw?

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

"As you can guess, Rico is my role model."

"Is the garbage fresh?"

Al Dante

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

North Fork, the town too tough to diet.

Will work for Food Network.

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"We'll just have the loaves and fishes. . ."

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."