Foodie Follower Pillows

Have you noticed how chefs have replaced hairdressers in the social pages?

"Isn't it enough we tip well? Must we also like him on Facebook and follow him on Twitter?"

"Why don't we just take photos of other people's food and order whatever gets the most Facebook likes?"

'I sent out for everything.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

The Fourth Little Pig

"You do like octopus?"

"Even the waiters here are organic."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

What the Doctor Ordered

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

Fast food. Even faster food

La Table

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

'Do you have any catsup?'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

Bad for you but to die for

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.