Foodie Follower Pillows

Have you noticed how chefs have replaced hairdressers in the social pages?

"Why don't we just take photos of other people's food and order whatever gets the most Facebook likes?"

'I sent out for everything.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

What the Doctor Ordered

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

"Even the waiters here are organic."

"You do like octopus?"

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

Ice Cream Surgeon

The Fourth Little Pig

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'Do you have any catsup?'

Fast food. Even faster food

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

La Table

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

Bad for you but to die for

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

"The space aliens who abducted me wanted to know what it was like to be loved...I wasted no time."