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Italian Stereotype

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

'Sorry, smile's off...'

'I'll need to see a financial statement before you can order.'

'You can learn a lot about a person by how they treat a waiter.'

'Miss Merton, I'd like a word with you about your mid-morning snacks.'

Nusret Gökçe

'She's on the rotation diet. Every time I turn around she's eating something.'

"You cheeky little monkey, Steven, trying to pinch a chip."

Masterchef.

'Take your time. They just fired the cook.'

'They do that every time. I think it's something in the meatballs.'

'Just remember in future, we don't accept bookings for Slimmers' Clubs' annual outings.'

"Is anyone enjoying anything?"

'I sent out for everything.'

Come dine with me!

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

What the Doctor Ordered

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

"You do like octopus?"

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

"Even the waiters here are organic."

Domestic Goddess.

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'