Food Prep Pillows

'Dressing the Salad. Why?'

LAY ZEE FUK

Counting ribs

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

Domestic Goddess.

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Hungry child

'Like death by salad.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

'I cleaned over thirty fish today.' - 'That takes guts.'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

Horn of Leftovers

Wendy likes horses...and she is a keen cook.

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

Surprise in the salad bowl

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'