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Mayo-A-Mayo

"Steak, Richard, is just grown up veal."

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

'The chef's hat was delicious! But the hair...'

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

'It was the last straw when she threw her lumpy gravy over me!'

"Beans count as healthy vegetables but jelly beans don't? Not faaaiiir!!!"

"Were you genuinely interested in where I get my protein, or was it the introductory question to a long and pointless attack on my personal dietary choices?"

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"

The Last Dinner

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

'Say, did you guys catch that report on the most important meal of the day?' ... 'I swear Breakfast, if you don't shut up already...'

"Patient continues to entertain the sincere delusion that apple pie served with a slice of cheese on top is delicious..."

'If you'd like to, you can discuss the question of eating genetically-modified food with our staff ethicist.'

"Papi, we've decided we want nothing but salads...and hamburgers...for every meal."

'Ever noticed how triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones?'

Once again, the conversation gets too heated, and the selection of a state muffin has to be shelved until next year.

Restrooms.

"What's all this fuss about genetically modified food, anyway?"

'Keep complaining about my meals and you can fry your own salad!'

'Here's a song for all of you who are conflicted over whether or not it's safe to eat genetically-modified food.'

"I've been eating genetically modified corn all my life and I don't see what all the fuss is about!"

'We do not discuss soybeans on these premises, Mrs. Grommet.'

Meat bi-products.

'Man, I go for genetically modified chicken food!'

James and I discussed at length what the best type of margarine was.

"All right, let's admit genetically-modified food will have an effect on people. It's fifty-fifty it'll be a good effect."

"I have mixed feelings about gluten"

"With religion and politics off the table, the only thing left to argue about is gluten."

"And now to present the arguments for chlorinated chicken. . ."

'If you put it that way, alright, I agree with you.'