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Bad Interview Technique

"Takes the food right out of your mouth."

The Perfect Foil

The Games Man: He spends many hours studying minute aquatic flies...which his trout very rarely eat.

Emotional Support Pest

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

'Let's see. One dozen red wigglers, two dozen nightcrawlers,three dozen crickets. Want flies with that?'

'How long has it been shaking like a bowl full of jelly when you laugh?'

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"

'Food fight!'

"Oh no, it's gone in that silly little hole again."

Basic economy

"Is this Haiku poopery?"

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

"Every good scene in that move was in the coming attractions...why did we even bother to come watch it?"

"Orange juice, 1/2 lb. bacon, dozen eggs, bread, coffee..."

Persian

Fly Club Singer: 'Wherever I Lay My Eggs, That's My Home...'

'EEEEEEX-CREMENT!'

No, no Henry. I said I bought a fly sweater for you.

Now it's time for Dung or no Dung! With your host Stinkhole Edmunds!

Flight School.

'I'm terribly sorry, I've forgotten my fluffy pencil case!'

'I'm sorry Daisy. Things can never be the same between us!'

Santa saying to shrink - "I don't believe in myself."

'We're very worried about your hormone levels.'

'Well, we just became unspectacular.'

Man on a flying machine amongst a flock of birds.

"Congratulations! You're the proud father of 5 thousand squirming little maggots!"

"Relax - I saw a bear do this on TV."

'I can't go on like this Wilfred - you've changed so - You're no longer the man I married.'

'You love anything tacky, don't you?'

"Well, technically, your eyes are bigger than your stomach."