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'You never knew your father - He was leaning out to watch Lady Godiva, and he fell in the moat.'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Swan Fairy Tales

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

'Are you made of sugar?'

Dragon Hair-dryer.

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

The Mouse Princess

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

A vampire in a canoe.

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

Rapunzel in the Morning

Don Quixote

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Falstaff

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

7 Dwarves of Retirement

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

"Oh, this? Crazy story..."

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

Wolf to Red Riding Hood: 'No thanks, I'm on a strict grandmother diet.'

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."