Folk Tune Teller Pillows

'Confessing your sins in a folk ballad was an interesting idea, Larry, but I'm afraid your singing has forced me to add one more sin to your list!'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Horror Stories.

"Take the off this minute, young lady."

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

Early accounting scandals.

"People who don't believe in soulmates just haven't met the right animal."

Snake Charmer's Snake on Strike.

"Frankly, Jackie Paper, I’ve done all I can with strings and sealing wax."

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

"How many verses of 'Froggie Went A-Courting' are there, Jay, before your pill kicks in?"

I love Harmonica

Art Garfunkel.

Great Moments in Musical Inspiration

"The times – They have a changed."

"When it comes to good, old-fashioned roots music, this guy is the BEST!"

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'

'Do you honestly expect me to believe that fairy tale?

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Concerto, Number One, first movement."

Bob Dylan

'...Stop trying to funk it up.'

World Of Cow - 'If you must know, it's my Birthday and I happen to be great friends with Bob Dylan.'

"This next song is about unbridled corporate greed and its propensity to decimate the planet … I hope you like it."

'And now for my William Tell shot.'

"Your story is quite the booze-filled dive into the depths of depravity. Is this your first children's book?"

'This next one I wrote myself. It's about pain, misery and heartbreak, until I finally wised up and dumped him.'

Two people play the guitar and harmonica.

"Here's one I wrote myself. It's called 'Blues for the Guy I'm Laying Off.'"

Spinning violinist

I swear, we rode right through the town and my mistress Lady Godiva wasn't wearing a thing...

"This machine isn't killing fascists."

'It started off as stories I told my wife.'

Birdwatchers making each other playlists

"This machine kills fascists, and this machine kills fascists, and this one is just a guitar."

Yeah, yeah, yeah - tell my editor the fables are almost done, and she'll have them as soon as