Folk Medicine Aficionado Pillows

"This could only be the work of...mal de ojo!"

Super-Tia makes Mal de Ojo undo its curse!

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

Doctor receiving advice from patient's mother

"I thought I'd give Western medicine one more chance."

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

Neil Young

"I'm sensing a nostalgia for when your mother rubbed butter on them."

Witch Doctor

'Take two of these, and call me in the morning!'

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

"My super-vision sees...someone yelling at his elders...Cousin Cecilia sneaking out her window...someone making a spinach burrito... No! I must stay focused...and find the evil villain mal de ojo!"

*Not suitable for those with an allergy to consciousness expansion

A Mom and Pop Operation

"Lately my joints are stiff." "You're rollin' 'em too tight. Try vaping."

'Eureka! It won't cure anything, but the side effects are terrific!'

"Dude, we've struck cannabis oil! We're going to be rich!"

Man passes Holistic Health Clinic and sees Holistic Donuts.

"I thought you said you were dating a rich doctor!"

'And just where did you study medicine?'

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

"My Harvard Medical Guide says if a wisdom tooth is infected, you may need antibiotics and possibly have the tooth pulled by an oral surgeon."

"Here, let me put some ointment on your bug bite. I made it myself from cayenne powder, licorice root and mugwort leaves blended with that vanilla pudding I made last week. Hmm...it's not here."

"Sergio, we don't have to spend so much money on health insurance."

"If you ask me, your Christmas gift return policy is too liberal."

"The pharmacist will be with you shortly to answer any questions that you have."

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

Acupressure Gauge

"Look at this: Acupuncture, aromatherapy, herbal tea. We could be dealing with a homoeopathic killer."

'I was hoping you could fix it with homeopathy.'

"I know you're just trying to be helpful, but why don't you let me decide where my acupuncture needles should go?"