Folk Fanatic Gifts

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

Ed Sheeran.

Cimafunk

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

Vlad the Inhaler

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

The Loch Ness Rowing Team

'...this is Loch Lomand!'

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

"Bigfoot"

Another Bigfoot sighting...

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

'She posted her first blog today.'

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

I crawled out of a toilet and ate a guy. Say my name 3 times in a mirror. I dare you. No one suspects I'm Slenderman. She took me home. Then she woke up in a tub of ice missing a kidney. Urban Legends-in-Their-Own-Minds.

Wolf to Red Riding Hood: 'No thanks, I'm on a strict grandmother diet.'

"Honey, where's the baby?" "The first voyage of Sinbad"

"You're ruining our reputation, Bob!"

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

Buoyed by his past success, William Tell sought even greater challenges,

"Tonight we are going out to plunder, lads!"

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

'I'm a SNOOOW-Man,...doo-doot-doo-doo, doo-doot-doo-doo, I'm a SNOOOW-Man!...'

"Do I have to go out again!?"