Fly-by-night Planners Pillows

"I live for twenty four hours. How can I fund a 401 K?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"Something romantic, perhaps?"

The end of summer is near and you still haven't made plans

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

"Honey, I don't want to hide anything from you. I collect pictures of cats in my spare time."

Dating is so expensive...

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

Funnel of Love

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

"They haven't mated yet, but I think we're getting close."

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

scrabble love

'A rose tattoo for your lady friend sir?...' A female Tattooist offering a rose tattoo, in the way of the old Rose Ladies in clubs and pubs

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

"I think we've had too much Wine. The cork-screw is surrendering."

'You wanted to go on a romantic outing. You're on a romantic outing.'

'I was so embarrassed when you tossed your y-fronts on stage.'

"A word of advice, sir...when your wife reaches for another slice of pizza, never, ever say, 'Are you sure you should be eating that?'"

Restaurant in the Strand.

"On time arrival...check. Paid for drinks...check. Made pleasant conversation...check. Didn't stare at mole...check."

"Okay then, what wine do you have if we go up to the four dollar range?"

"Hello ... Susan ... Joe ... Not ... Make ... It ... Me ... Joe's ... Robot ... Me ... Programmed ... Take ... You ... Dinner ..."

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

"We'll go out for a quiet candlelight dinner, slowdance on the beach to the music of Barry White, then make love in a warm, cozy bed!"

Bowling. 24 Lanes. Going bowling for date night with my girlfriend as a bad idea. A split was inevitable.

Romantic Frogs

Romance

'Jingling your change won't get us a better table.'

Couples Massage

"On your marks..."