Flow Chart Fanatic Gifts

'Did I make this confusing enough?'

"I thought an illogical framework would work better."

'Who's that pathetic little one down there?'

"As you can see, it's pretty simple - just find the customer and make him buy."

"So if my calculations are correct, you're all completely asleep by now and I can just leave."

"Sorry Helen but you knew I was a management consultant before we got married!"

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Tell the vice presidents they've downsized enough."

When Engineers Crack.

"That one shows our office cliques."

'Herb will provide one of his concise interpretations of the quarterly sales charts.'

"I might just get a pie."

"And this is where we all gave up."

"Managing a major project in these challenging times requires IMAGINATION, the FIRST thing I'd like you to imagine is that you have a team to help you."

"You're wasting your time, I'll never understand which one is Liam Hemsworth and which one is Chris Hemsworth."

Pecking order.

'You'll learn that our corporate structure is a bit unconventional.'

How Many It Takes

Ed is upset because he didn't get the promotion he had promised himself.

'People who can read Venn diagrams...'

'You are here.'

'Nice work. A fluid work force with a minimum of drips.'

Organization Chart

'I see you have a stock market/body connection.'

Loans. To make a long story short, my cash flow needs some new tributaries.

'These are the people who'll be line managing you.'

"Of course nobody can make head nor tale of it, but the good news is that it's been nominated for the Turner prize next year."

"This seems to work better for us!"

'Great cash flow, Phil.'

'I hate these staff shakeups.'

'I know last week's class was brutal, but I have all new material today.'

"That's not our logo. That's the company's flowchart."

"I wish it was the chart of my financial portfolio, but no, it's my wife recording how many children we've had..."