Flea-free Fanatic Pillows

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'He exuded the confidence of an exec who had closed mega deals, and hadn't found a flea in a week.'

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

The Games Man: He spends many hours studying minute aquatic flies...which his trout very rarely eat.

"Fleas talk about their life aboard cats..."

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

'Food fight!'

'She broke up with me because I'm a stray and, thus, always have fleas!'

'Yup...you've got em' alright. And they brought their circus, too.'

"Is this Haiku poopery?"

Whilst browsing in his local flea market, Jimmy has an awkward encounter with an ex.

"I'd hate to see the flea big enough to wear those!"

"I've built this business up from scratch. . . "

'...Pack your bags. When we get indside, we're moving to the cat.'

"Sorry, nature calls, I'll be back in five minutes: Suzie, you're in charge..."

'My boss collects stupid hats, Is yours for sale?'

Fly Club Singer: 'Wherever I Lay My Eggs, That's My Home...'

"I didn't even know they could knit!"

'Your dog or mine?'

'It's just until he stops biting himself over there.'

'You don't want to show favouritism Bruce-it upsets the others.'

'I want a straightforward answer: Did you or did you not willfully claw a flea to death on your left ear?'

Now it's time for Dung or no Dung! With your host Stinkhole Edmunds!

No, no Henry. I said I bought a fly sweater for you.

"Please, please, please Mum! The flea circus has arrived: can we go?!"

'EEEEEEX-CREMENT!'

"No wonder it's itchy: You have a whole flea circus on your back!"

"Dad, sit still! I'm trying to watch the flea-circus acts!"

'That's the worst case of fleas I've ever seen...!'

"Congratulations! You're the proud father of 5 thousand squirming little maggots!"

Four fleas line up for a race on a dog: 'Hey, did you hear about Frank... he was scratched!'

Flea Market:'Won't be a minute...I'm just going for a top-up.'