Flatulence Funnybone Pillows

"That new drug causes flatulence."

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"Gerald converted the barbecue grill to natural gas."

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'I'm SECRET Santa, kid.'

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

'There is a kid at school who can play 'Jingle Bells' with his farts. That is impressive because flatulence is a difficult medium.'

Sigh. They never ask me to play.

Movers and shakers.

'I'm afraid it's mad cow disease.'

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

The Fart Side

"For Feng Shui I'd like to move your liver above your lungs.''

Dave soon realised it was going to be a tough gig.

'Over on stage number two is the lovely, succulent, Misty Flatulence!'

Policeman to driver; 'You gotta be kidding. Your name is actually Anna Nicole Smith?'

"If at first you don't succeed, give up skydiving."

"There ya go. Cushion rot from farting into the same old chair for 40 years"

"Sadly, we're seeing more and more of this as we encroach on their natural habitat."

'They must be trash fish!'

"I lost 5 pounds and you didn't even notice!"

'Don't be frightened, he's only been 'n' gone 'n' done his back in again.'

'Do Not Pass' and 'Gas'.

'He specializes in chicken dishes.'

'You have Drattus Flatulence, or what we commonly call 'Darn Tootin'!'

After having had beans at the last motorway cafe...The lorry driver hadn't realized gasses had built up in his cab.

'Relax, I'm only going to open a window.'

"You know, we could easily handle this peacefully, but there are too many adults on the field."

'Miss Mckinley, do you have a penny? My desk is wobbly.'