Flatpack Furniture Foes Gifts

"Go and kill everyone in Ikea!"

The Lion, the witch and the flat-pack self-assembly wardrobe: lion and witch putting a wardrobe together.

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

'Handyman's Special'

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

'I don't want to be a nuisance, you can shoot me if it's more convenient.'

'That's not what it looked like in the shop...' - 'It's near enough.'

Chair - Ready for Self Assembly.

"It says it can be assembled by a 5 year old child - pop out and find me one..."

"I can't find the instructions."

"Thank God you're here, first I need your help assembling this Ikea exorcism futon."

'It's lovely. Have you actually built a flat-pack kitchen before?'

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

'I'll give him twenty minutes, then jump in and show him how its done.'

Self-Assembly Bookcase

"Relax. They come in pieces."

Man tries to build a traditional Indian Guru bed using flatpack furniture.

'Are you ready for me to read the instructions yet?'

"Don't forget to read the assembly details before you start."

'What did I tell you about buying a flatpack wardrobe!'

Next time you buy a car, can you ask if it is self assembly?

"He's the best man in our cipher department, sir. Even we don't understand his stuff. He used to do assembly instructions for Ikea."

Flat pack sales assistant

"Don't worry. Think of it as putting together that Swedish furniture...there's always pieces left over."

A flat-pack cow.

'No, Joseph didn't make the crib, it was a flat pack!'

"It's your new IKEA store, sign here."

"The Great Ikeamids"

'And this is your desk.'

"There's always one annoying piece left over."

"It's very good but we bought a wardrobe."

"Next time you buy a car... can you ask if it is self assembly?"

"Let's just go with the open floor plan."

Bird builds birdhouse around himself.