Flat-pack Aficionado Gifts

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

"Don't worry. Think of it as putting together that Swedish furniture...there's always pieces left over."

The Lion, the witch and the flat-pack self-assembly wardrobe: lion and witch putting a wardrobe together.

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

'Handyman's Special'

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

DIY horror.

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

"Connect A2 to B3, insert D3 into E5....I hate flat packs!"

'That's not what it looked like in the shop...' - 'It's near enough.'

'I don't want to be a nuisance, you can shoot me if it's more convenient.'

Chair - Ready for Self Assembly.

"It says it can be assembled by a 5 year old child - pop out and find me one..."

"Thank God you're here, first I need your help assembling this Ikea exorcism futon."

"I can't find the instructions."

'It's lovely. Have you actually built a flat-pack kitchen before?'

"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure this stuff out, but..."

Fred began to understand why this kit house was so cheap.

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

'I'll give him twenty minutes, then jump in and show him how its done.'

Man tries to build a traditional Indian Guru bed using flatpack furniture.

Self-Assembly Bookcase

'Are you ready for me to read the instructions yet?'

Next time you buy a car, can you ask if it is self assembly?

"He's the best man in our cipher department, sir. Even we don't understand his stuff. He used to do assembly instructions for Ikea."

Flat pack sales assistant

A flat-pack cow.

'No, Joseph didn't make the crib, it was a flat pack!'

"It's your new IKEA store, sign here."

'And this is your desk.'

"The Great Ikeamids"

"There's always one annoying piece left over."

"It's very good but we bought a wardrobe."

"Next time you buy a car... can you ask if it is self assembly?"

'We come in pieces.'