Fitness Rebels Pillows

"I swapped my 'couch to 5K' training app for a '5K to couch' one!"

Any time is cake o'clock

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

'Ahh...now there's a man who understands women.'

"I'm a monster."

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

"Hide the file in one of your gluten-free cakes – so the guards won't eat it."

'Fashion Police Incident Area'

"Why are we eating all this fattening stuff? Pier pressure."

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

'I found this bag of salad hidden in the locker room - who's is it?'

Gym. Try our Boot Camp Classes. I was dishonorably discharged!

"If medical science wants to be really relevant, it would find a way to let me eat all the bacon I want!"

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

"I think the problem is that you're not eating properly..."

"I just love these casual fridays."

"It's improv night."

'But the invitation says 'come as you are'.'

Fitness in church.

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

'The good news is you don't have to worry about cholesterol, carbs, or trans fat.'

"Look, you took a huge fashion risk and it just didn't work out for you."

"We tried healthy birthday treats. That lasted about a week."

Attempting to eat your own bodyweight in cake can act as a mood enhancer.

Dieting is for losers.

'Headmaster I'd like to report Biggins and Small who were caught this morning consuming trans-fats behind the bicycle shed.'

'I always shop here. They don't sell low fat ice cream so the guilt is gone.'

What can I get you? Ham sandwich with extra cheese. Double banana split. Side of sugar. Coming up, sir. I am abandoning my New Year's diet! If you're gonna go down, go down in flames. Burn these gym clothes!

"I didn't miss my workout...I didn't miss it one bit!"

"Beans count as healthy vegetables but jelly beans don't? Not faaaiiir!!!"

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

Diet Enforcer

That's not quite what I meant by a 'balanced diet'..

"Smacked down by reality in 24 seconds."