Fitness Realist T-Shirts

"... I CAN'T be 'at risk for a heart attack,' I never exert myself!"

Fast Food Dieter

"This is my exercise routine, and this is my routine to avoid that exercise routine."

'Never, Ever...be fooled by tv infomercials.'

Problem of getting older.

"I am exercising. I'm doing some online walking around an online mall."

In the Guru District

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'My feet are killing me.'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"Portrait of a Lady"

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

'Well, well, well...'

Muscles

Turn, turn and turn.

'Every piece of equipment is hooked up to battery cells in the basement, and we actually sell electricity back to the power company!'

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that?"

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

Yearbook

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

Man at computer at sports company wears sweat band on head.

Monica Seles

Bodybuilder pumping himself up.

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

Exercise Class

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"We're exclusively delts."