Fitness Gifts

"New Year's Resolution - Stay This Good-Looking!"

"I lost ten pounds in 2 weeks, mostly by swimming."

"Good coffee."

'It all started with some harmless stretching exercises.'

'How much longer do I have before I have to change to a healthy lifestyle?'

Too many coxes.

"Exercise is the best medicine. Jump."

"I can cure your back problem, but there's a risk that you'll be left with nothing to talk about."

"I work out so I don't have to eat kale."

"It's for my back. You have two more questions."

"Gruelling as this is, it's not a total-body workout."

"What the hell happened in P.E.?"

"Want to know how many steps we took?"

'...Then touch your toes twenty times.'

'I don't do much traditional exercise. But I make sure to get my heart rate up by freaking out at the office on a regular basis.'

"What I Did on My Summer Vacation."

"No, it's not a typo."

"I love your body - where did you get it?"

Warming up

'I think it's time to concentrate a little more on your upper body!'

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

The over-40 workout

'We put them on the stair master until their paperwork goes through'

"Frankly, counselor, I don't care how stressful this is for your client—tell him to get out of that damn yoga position."

"I'd like to see him try that on the leg press."

Gym Resolutions

Just Do It. Just Did It.

'I understand the concept, sir, but I think I'd do better if it were a donut.'

Bacteria Special Offer

'When I asked if you were flexible, Mrs. Harkness, I was asking about your hours!'

"You've got the blood pressure of a teenager ? who lives on junk food, TV and the computer."

'Does it hurt when I do this?'

Warning. Objects in mirror my bear no relation to reality.

"I don't get it. If he's no faster than me, how come he always beats me?"

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"