First Day T-Shirts

'Table 6 wants a glass of sangria, with chips--do you think that's enough?'

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

My First Camera

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

I'm Bored With Educational Toys

Today we learned to count to one.

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

'Wow! That's some growth spurt!'

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

'A dog ate my homework.'

'I don't like the sound of the engine.'

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"It's a mobile."

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

"And this is my junior partner, my son, Ira."

"We thought this was more realistic."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

"It's going to be one of those days."

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

'You may feel lost and insignificant at first working for us.'

"I have a feeling this is gonna be one tough course."

Learning.

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'