First-chapter Fanatic T-Shirts

'To be honest, that's all most people read.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Television Readers.

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

Characters jumping out of a book.

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

Science fiction fans on other planets

'Sue didn't watch soap operas all the time. She also reads books'

Addicted to reading

"Hold on, that's my Mom dressed up like 'Xena, Princess Warrior'....real mature, Mom!"

"I'm ready for summer vacation! A good book takes you where you've never been!"

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

Reading

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

'Here's the good news. 'Happy camper' and 'are we having fun yet' have been added to the official list of banned cliches.'

Maps to the homes of guys with friends who know some of the limo drivers of the personal trainers of the stars.

'I don't like to brag, but I'm the guy who coined the phrase, 'Honey, I'm Home'.'

'It's very fast-paced. The book was over before I could finish reading it.'

"You're not a real fan. You're just dressed up like a slut for attention."

Fellow Sheep of the Ring

'Let's cut right through to the heart of the matter.'

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Futuristic Teenagers.

Football supporters.

Heaven

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

"After the big race, the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."