First Aid Practitioner Gifts

Monk applying plasters in the shape of a cross.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

First aid in mountains

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

"I'm sure he'll pull through. He's always been a real fighter."

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

'Can't you give the dummy mouth to mouth without getting romantically involved Mrs Wilks?'

'Have you tried a licensed health practicioner?'

First aid departments

"Honey! What's wrong. . . Mommy get you a band-aid!"

"Time to administer scout leader first aid protocol..."

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

First Aid Box

'I hope you all appreciate the irony in this.'

"Mrs. Barnes is to have a complete head-to-toe – she's to be the victim in a bandage-instruction class."

Crashed Aliens - "Miss Fortnum, come in here immediately..and bring the first aid kit."

"My God, now what?"

Extreme Naturopathic Medicine.

Medical Supplies

Acupuncture clinic

Acupuncturist Society Cocktail Party - 'For heaven's sake, Brian, it's only a pineapple chunk!'

'Don't you people ever take a pulse? ! '

"Next time you give CPR try not to use your tongue."

Man who hits finger and screams for help has his mouth bound up instead of his finger by unsympathetic wife.

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

'Now, lift and squeeze the diaphragm.' ... 'Sweet.'

"Nah, he doesn't need the Heimlich. I just don't like his tip."