Fireworks Technician Gifts

"Who wants to help me with the fireworks this year?"

Jake's career at Akme Fireworks ended with a bang.

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

US National holiday

Astronaut finds used firework on the moon.

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

Monster Clown

Me cold. Need heat cave. Fire works. To make metal tools, I need to melt these rocks. Fire works. I'd like a romantic atmosphere for my date tonight. Fire works. How should we celebrate the founding of our new nation? Fireworks!

Sparkler

'I know that it's the Fourth of July, but I still don't think an air conditioner is supposed to do this.'

'Sure, I'm nervous. Remember OUR first date?'

Best Special Effects Award

"Instead of a bedtime story, how about strapping a bottle rocket to your doll and setting it off in your little brother’s room?" "Brad was a terrible father."

"Put him back and go and make your own guy!"

"And now for my fabulous 4th of July finale. . ."

Sparklers

'I am prosecuting you for a breach of article 5 of the explosives act, storing black powder in a dangerous manor on unlicensed premises.'

Bayonne Festival

Conducting Handel's Fireworks Music with a Sparkler

"As soon as our state legalizes fireworks, gay marriage, and marijuana - I'm going to start throwing awesome parties you're not invited to."

July 5...payback.

"The opening night is always a bit special!"

"Mom forbids me to have fireworks. She gave me this cereal instead!"

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

'Happy New Year!'

"And, of course all our rockets come with a three second warranty."

"...It's to celebrate winning the world cup in 1966"

'Top floor, please.'

'I was on my way to see why so many people were gathered in the park when the fireworks started...'

Bill for Stronger Fireworks.