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'The Democrats steal more books, but the Republicans have more overdue fines.'

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"Where are you guys going?" "We’re out of here!" "It’s October 28th!" "The new team are running late. We need you to stay until February 2025!" "But I’m tired!!" "How do we know they won’t bail on us again?"

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

' I hit two good balls today - when I stepped on that rake.'

"Data is just another way of never having to say you're sorry. You know that, David."

'We take late returns very seriously at this library Mr Wilson!'

Book from the Library of Alexandria. Woman says: 'Have you seen how overdue this book is?'

'A Mr Ritzwell to see you, sir. Are you in, or are you using the escape tunnel?'

'What's the point of having a luxury car if you put it in the garage at night?'

"He's not good with change!"

"Sorry I'm late, but I was somewhere else."

'I'' be in the basement, Amy... below the radar.'

Stand in the Q.

The coward's way out.

"If that's for me, tell them I'm in a meeting."

Man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Did You Forget Mother's Day?

Car driving on tube line - 'They'll do anything to avoid the new congestion charge.'

"How much do we owe them?"

"Someday I'll hire lots of smart people to work for me."

'New dog?' - 'Yes, and no more food bills, no vets fees.'

'My last book did not have a happy ending. I had to pay a fine.'

"Math scares me so much I can't even add it to my list of anxieties."

'Dude. Seriously? Tell me you didn't put your tongue on that thing.'

I hitched to work...and left early to avoid the traffic.

"A book report? -- Wouldn't that be a copyright violation?"