Finding Humor In Fear Prints

'Was that you who screamed?' - 'No, the dentist.'

Out To Lurch

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

Our super-heroes bravely battling a brutally blustery day!

Human Flesh Eaters: A Romance Comedy.

Superhero with Acrophobia

'Stop complaining. We can't afford business class any more.'

Agoraphobic Explorer

Pray it Don't Spry it.

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'

Room 101 Tax Inspection

'I see you've met Butch.'

Shoveling Snow

At first she didn't want to live if it meant being attached to tubes. But before you knew it, they were getting along just fine.

"Well, the MRI confirms it: you have a shy bladder."

'Bill got sacked, sleeps on a park bend and eats dog food. He's the most motivational speaker we've ever had.'

'So, what's it like to lick a light socket, Mr. Safety?'

A man's head disappears into his torso, replaced by a sign that reads: Next Showing 1:00

'Bottles water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!...'

Maximum Insecurity Prison

'Then again, it probably wasn't that bad. I do tend to exaggerate.'

How's my absolution! (800)-HAIL MARY

"Timing is everything. The moment they relax and stop waiting for the other shoe to drop, I let 'em have it!"

"You didn't believe her when she said there was a giant spider in the bathtub, did you?"

'This next bit might hurt just a teenie-weenie bit...'

"Do you really believe, Gerald?"

"You have three weeks to live, and I'm afraid they're in Feburary."

'Not only did life pass me by, it HIP-CHECKED me!'

'Come, come, Mr Walker...it's only an inspection.'

'Have you tried watching C-SPAN?'

Now I have two types of free-floating anxiety!

Insurance Claims Offices: Push and Pull the Other One!

"And keep your toes covered! If you don't el cucuy will eat them! Good night!"

'This divorce is so bitter I hope he wants it so bad he can taste it.'