Financial Times Fan Prints

Bench for the Bankers.

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

Bank Loan Dept. Personal Business. Uh-oh, some loans have gone bad! A tennis pro defaulted and a novelist is in Chapter 7. The bed linens company folded and the scuba school went under! Are any of our loans still good? Yeah, the music streaming service is totally sound! And ironically, the lighting company is in the black!

LEMONADE 50 CENTS, 'I'm only seven years old -- I don't HAVE a credit rating yet!'

European currency on the edge.

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

"I made money the old fashioned way. I inherited it."

Economy - USA.

What do you suggest we do about this?

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

'I enjoy the old-fashioned pleasures - a walk on the beach, plain food and piles of cash.'

"Our initial public offering, .... The public has gotten wind of it!"

'Of course I'm squirreling away money!'

Greek Crisis

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

'Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.'

'You go without me. I'm feeling a little down today.'

'This app is linked to my financial advisor and provides stimulated hand-holding when the market is down.'

Piggy Bank Coin I.V.

'And this just in from the stock market... buy, sell, buy, sell, buy, sell, buy!'

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

'Stocks rose on news that '90% of success is just being there.''

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

August is corporate earnings restatement season.

'In today's market news, losers outnumbered those who were wiped out.'

Shareholders Meeting - We will be paying a dividend but I will not be announcing it here.

'How much did you save this year?'

The Cashless Society is Here

'Stocks were high...then low...then suddenly high again on news of a new drug to treat mood swings...'

"Good news on Wall Street today"