Financial Realists Pillows

"Happiness is more important than money,but it is easier to count money."

'Where would you like to not be able to afford to go on vacation this year'

"Apparently, the coronavirus hasn't stopped our bills from coming."

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

'Your salary will help you learn the lesson that life is not fair.'

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"It's a shame, excellent recommendations and a superb skill set but lacks the boiling hot all consuming ambition and ruthless desire for self promotion required as head of stationary procurement."

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

'But I do have fun. I have lots lots of fun. I have lots of fun making money.'

"We do have faith but I'm afraid our policy is still not to accept Bitcoin."

Recession

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

'Mr. Barnes was going to interview you for the job, until he realized you were actually expecting financial compensation, benefits and vacation time.'

'Good news, Mr. Blume! Your condition isn't serious - just expensive.'

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

Great moments in science. . . 'Nice work, you've isolated the funding gene.'

"I'm not particular, I'll take any job that will replace a human."

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

'I've fired the entire company except you, Jerkins. You'll have more work without pay, but you do have job security.'

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

'Remember Jones, your organs are worth more to us than your intellectual property.'

"Financial Adviser advises client 'I advise you that you're broke'."

"Goodbye cruel world."

US Dollar weakens.

Squeezing a tight budget...

'Look at my new overdraft its fantastic.'

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

'The bad news is that the dollar is down -- the good news is that nobody seems to have any.'

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

"Fourteen months ago, I started with H20. I just ended with H20."

"I need the saw again."