Financial Philosophizer Gifts

Women talking: 'What's the point of being debt free if you have to live poor?'

Bank Checking and Savings. Your account is overdrawn, sir. Haven't you heard?! Deficit spending is all the rage!

'Those were years of such ambitious plans ... before the money ran out.'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

Wall St. or True Love.

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

'It's crunch time, Caldwell. That's the time between when you're born, and when you make your first million.'

Flat tax - equal burden?

'My ambition used to drive the economy. Now it drives my Mercedes.'

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

Stockbroker and Psychotherapist: Money won't make you happy and therapy won't make you rich.

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

'We need people who dream the impossible dreams - like pensions and health care.'

Money god

"Money is life's report card."

"Yes, I am interested in taking a fresh look at my holdings."

Economic Downturns

'We were in the right place at the right time but, unfortunately, we were in the wrong time zone.'

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

"Stocks edged lower on the news there's more to life than the accumulation of material things..."

"Lucky for you, you died during a bear market."

"The problem with capitalism is the unequal sharing of wealth. The problem with socialism is the equal sharing of wealth..."

Accountant Manqué

'I think you need to reboot your fiscal compass.'

Portfolio, 2014 - For a richer enjoyment, allow to age.

"I hope you love me for my money, not for who I am."

'We do spend a lot and tax a lot, but it's the price you pay for living in a money-based economy.'

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

"The red bars represent the obscene numbers this quarter. The black bars are censoring those red bars."

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'