Financial Parody Enthusiast Gifts

"Thar someone from the IRS blows!"

'Now that I have your attention...'

British savings accounts

'The check is in the email attachment.'

The truth is, Congressman, we didn't know it was wrong to screw people.

Loan Alley

America's Funniest Interest Rate Hikes

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

'All we can do is hope for identity theft.'

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

Jumping Wall Street.

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

'Now let's proceed downstairs and see where our stock shares presently sits,'

Greek Crisis

"Your stork analyst is here, sir."

Out of control

'What do you mean, the chart resembles an iceberg?'

Where Ignorance is Bliss.

"At least we're consistent ... "

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'Bad news on Wall Street. The entire stock market has been downgraded to a 'junk' classification.'

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

'A temporary solution would be to white out this part of the chart.'

'Our fund lost millions, but the good news is our management fees are not based on performance.'

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

'The fourth quarter was no walk in the park. Especially for those who count on us to walk in the park.'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

In case of falling markets break glass.

'In today's market news, losers outnumbered those who were wiped out.'

Your son has a genetic inability to calculate. This forecasts for him a brilliant career in the Ministry of Finance.