Financial Irony Aficionado Gifts

'Is it okay to put my credit card payment on my credit card?'

British savings accounts

America's Funniest Interest Rate Hikes

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

'Now let's proceed downstairs and see where our stock shares presently sits,'

Out of control

'What do you mean, the chart resembles an iceberg?'

"At least we're consistent ... "

'Our fund lost millions, but the good news is our management fees are not based on performance.'

"Originally I wanted to be a stockbroker but found I fainted at the sight of money.''

'I today's market news, Greed roared back.'

The Decline of the Euro.

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Bank notes coming out of a safe.

'...But the good news is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

'Due to current market conditions, I'm recommending that my clients invest heavily into pain medication companies.'

A few Halloween costume ideas.

Ireland and its Celtic Tiger request some donations

'We stopped to smell the darn roses here!'

'The market dropped on the news some IRS refund checks said 'do not cash until next Friday'.'

"I see you have the latest in accounting software."

Budget Cuts

"How much do I need? How much you got?"

"I'm afraid with your income I couldn't possibly approve a loan of that size. Would you like a list of our approved loan sharks?"

Inflation is a national headache. . . caused by asset indigestion!

"We can't all work for Goldman Sachs."

'You won't feel a thing. We make a small incision in your wallet and...'

"Willis has kindly agreed to sum up our current financial position."

A man notices the Chase logo has turned into snakes eating themselves."

'I have an expense account, but it's a joke.'

'Business is very good. We'll soon be moving to smaller premises.'

"I don't recall ever hearing the stockholders speak with such a unified voice as they did today!"

"Gold ended the day on a new high, while frankincense and myrrh both opened well but faded as the markets closed."

Business men's lunches: Tycoons ?25, On the way downers ?2.50.