Financial Gladiator Gifts

'How to handle market stress' book being thrown through investments office window.

'As a small saver I've been fighting on the financial front everyday. Now I've been hit and my poor brave purse bled dry.'

"Are you sure you put up a fight to save the account?"

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

Rage.

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"Well, it's unanimous. Instead of going out of business quietly, with dignity and grace, we've decided to end things killer asteroid-style, taking as many of our competitors with us as possible!"

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"When you've been here as long as I have, you'll start to burn out"

'Dog eat dog.'

'I'm telling ya, it's a jungle out there.'

They loved the presentation on competing in the marketplace.

"Everything's gone up."

"Impressive, yes, but what exactly is a black belt in cookery?"

'I feel confident about our presentation. If there is any blowback, don't worry. We're both wearing our flak jackets under our suits.'

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

American Football.

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

'So far we're holding off overseas competition.'

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

Punishment for the kicker.

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

"It's a 24/7 work culture out there!"

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

'I'm calling you out, account to account.'

Football.

"They pay well but they expect a lot from you."

"Do we want to tackle this head on, or just stun it with a glancing blow until Monday?"

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

"A Japanese company will deliver them to us for �6.75 a thousand."

Business cartoon showing a stressed business woman who has three urgent messages on her office door.