Financial Fortunetellers T-Shirts

"It's not the grant we expected, but it's better than a kick in the pants."

Wall Street .

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

Card Reader in PC Supplies Store.

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

Chicken - "The Dow is falling...the dow is falling..."

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

Bad news airbag

Share Prices - "Due to a delay in installing our new computer price system, I can give you an answer immediately."

'I wonder if I can increase its range?'

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

"I'm a little uneasy about the 'sometimes'."

"Forget about tall and handsome. What about portfolio 10 year highs and lows?"

'Today, stocks dropped on poll numbers that 60% of people expected it to drop.'

"I like the Businessman's Special. The fortune cookies all have stock futures in them."

Your Winning Lottery Numbers Told: 'If they are really what you say - how come you can only afford a tent?'

'One day, son, all this willy be yours...only by then it will have grown and grown...to hundreds of billions...it's called the cost of PFI.'

"A fool and his money are soon parted."

"I can't keep giving you stock tips. The SEC has been making 'insider trading' inquiries."

'And to my no good nephew Milo, who thought he was going to get all my cash - lots of luck!'

"And that wraps it up for today's headlines. For a preview of what's happening tomorrow, here's Cassandra..."

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

"I see that you're very concerned about the rise of AI technology."

'And this is where we attempt to forecast the true size of the spending cuts!'

'You will make big bucks, then you'll give it all away to reduce your taxes.'

Vision Board: If you're reading this, it's not too late.

Bill Gates Waiting for the Stock Market to Bounce Back

Your weight and fortune.

'He said my future stinks.'

"Hurry it up, Solomon Brothers are waiting for my decision"

'And there you have it. According to our experts, the stock market will either advance, decline, or remain unchanged this year.'

"Remember, Joey, Life is a good preparation for stocks -- lots of ups and downs."

'Stocks and bonds dropped...on news that 'all that glitters is not gold'.'

"I see no new taxes, followed by some new taxes."

"Your next of kin is going to inherit a lot of money."