Finance Student Pillows

"They've made these fund prospectuses much easier to read." Brochure states; 'Give us all your money and get lost."

Consumer Confidence 50c

Dangers of Inflationary Fiscal Policy

'Stocks soared on news a financial lobbyist wants 'greed' dropped as one of the cardinal sins.'

Eurobonds Explained.

"Mother, I sold the cow for some financial derivatives."

Where your mind & battle are los

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

Robot Parts $5

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Computer Room.

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'C'mon get it straight.'

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

Big Bang Theory.

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Eternal Student.

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

Burning the midnight oil.

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

Guitarist

"What's a debenture?"

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

The Bookworm

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.