Film Personnel T-Shirts

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

Herman Mankiewicz

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

The ghosts of Christmas yet to come.

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

The star hunters

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"Say hello to my little friend."

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

"I hurt a lot of people during my last twelve steps."

'Dad's bedtime story was decent, but the special effects were non-existent.'

Censors 'no' a good thing when they see it.

Candid Camera store.

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

Canadian film production