Film Industry Observer Gifts

The Sequel is Coming

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

"That shirt is so last year."

Tom Hanks

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

"We can stop entertaining ourselves now, Ian."

Hollywood Breakup

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

"This just in — I no longer have a job."

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

'Yes, we have a very diversified economy around here.'

'We don't know what the final result will look like, but the movie rights have already been optioned.'

"Jessica has an idea about going to the beach that she'd like to pitch you."

"Bob, you're just not selling me on you essential hamburgerness."

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

Hollywood or bust!

Lord of the Rings IV.

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

"I'm thinking action roles might not really be your thing."

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

Welcome to Hollywood

Casting Director

Jennifer Lawrence

"He's the exception: a fly on the wall who made it big in blockbuster movies."

Melanie Griffith

"They say she's gone completely Sundance."

"I see you do all your own stunts."

"You're going out there an annoying, mannered girl, but you're going to come back an indie queen."

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

When stars marry: 'Why did you ask him first? Does he have top billing?'

"A P.R. Intern Named Salome with the Head Shot of John the Client."

Restraining orders from the stars.