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"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Herman Mankiewicz

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Bloody hell!"

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Canadian film production

Moby Dick

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

"Spoiler alert."

Arnold's first day on the job - 'What do you mean...no director!!!...and who is going to tell me what to do?'

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

"Why don't you just go and see this summer's feel-good movie?"

'What do you mean, 'pass the remote control'?... We're at the cinema!'